you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
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