I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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