hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
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