Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
