Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
Randomize
