think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
Dick very happy bro
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
Randomize
