I just pynch a tree in the face
Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
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