i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
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Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
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