as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
How do I tell my mom that she just went to the gym with my water bottle filled with vodka...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
Randomize