Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
just threw up on dog. broke microwave with cheese and spoon. having a bath with my barbies singing final countdown.
before you ask yes i found the absinthe under your bed. ITS THE FINAL COUNTDOWWWWNNNNNN
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
