I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
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