It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
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