i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
Randomize
