we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize
