like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
Randomize
