Need sex. Gaining weight.
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
Randomize
