oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
Randomize