You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
Randomize
