The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
He did a backflip because drugs
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
Randomize
