She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
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