I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
Randomize
