are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
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