we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
Randomize
