It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
Randomize
