suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
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