Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
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