ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
Randomize
