worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
How does one acquire holy water?
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
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