so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
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