Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
