Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
Randomize
