So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize
