I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
You left your underwear on the fireplace
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
This is the minute she broke up with me. If you're receiving this mass text, you are one for the girls who made me promise to text you at this point.
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Randomize
