Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
Randomize
