You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
You realize your sleeping pills are working when you pick up your iPhone and almost bite it because you thought it was a graham cracker
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
Let the clothes fall where they may.
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
Randomize
