Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
Randomize
