Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
There's even glitter on my cock...
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