I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize
