i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
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