i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
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