Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
