am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
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