The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Randomize