Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Nothings more american than taking a shit with a handgun next to you.
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
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