Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
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