Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
I stole all of the toasting champagne and did an interpretive dance to "wind beneath my wings". I am literally everything you're not supposed to do at weddings.
But your showmanship is impeccable.
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize