You made me cry and you don't even care
I just ate a drumstick out of the garbage. I need a life coach.
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
I have feelings that need drinking.
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
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