i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
My fucking roommate unpluged my alarm; I pissed on his clean clothes.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
