Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
Randomize
