So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
I have post one night stand depression
Randomize
