guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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